Romance is Boring

A friend of mine posted this link on Facebook last week…I cried when I read it.

I’ve written before that my husband is not a romantic of flashy man. He is boring.

But to me, boring isn’t a bad thing. And this article describes it perfectly.

To me, romance isn’t about a fancy proposal or a big wedding…those things are only minutes in a lifetime of marriage.

(Romance is) a man who imagines washing puked-on sheets at 2:30 am, plunging out a full and plugged toilet for the third time this week, and then scraping out the crud in the bottom screen of the dishwasher — every single night for the next 37 years without any cameras rolling or soundtrack playing — that’s imagining true romance.

The man who imagines slipping his arm around his wife’s soft, thickening middle age waistline and whispering that he couldn’t love her more

How a man proposes isn’t what makes him romantic. It’s how a man purposes to lay down his life that makes him romantic.

This “boringness” is something that I’ve recently come to appreciate more about my husband as we grow together in our marriage (our 5 year anniversary is coming up soon). Perhaps it’s something that has come to me in my “maturity” (I just turned 25 lol).

When I see young girls posting on FB about the flowers or surprise gifts their boyfriends or spouses gave them, I am happy for them. But I am learning to not be jealous. Because what I have from my husband is a different kind of romance (I’m not saying it’s not better or worse). It’s a subtle, boring type of romance.

Sure, go ahead, have fun, make a ridiculously good memory and we’ll cheer loud: propose creatively — but never forget that what wows a woman and woos her is you how you purpose to live your life.

While I may have days where I want romance and I wish my husband would do something worthy of going viral on the internet, if I look deep inside myself, what I really want is a lifetime of steady and boring love.

Can you see it again – how your grandfather stood over your grandmother’s grave and brushed away his heart leaking without a sound down his cheeks?

50 boring years. 50 unfilmed years of milking 70 cows, raising 6 boys and 3 girls, getting ready for sermon every Sunday morning, him helping her with her zipper. 50 boring years of arguing in Dutch and making up in touching in the dark, 50 boring years of planting potatoes and weeding rows on humid July afternoons, 50 boring years of washing the white Corel dishes and turning out the light on the mess – till he finally carried her in and out of the tub and helped her pull up her Depends.

Be one of the boring ones. Pray to be one who get 50 boring years of marriage – 50 years to let her heart bore a hole deep into yours.


2 thoughts on “Romance is Boring

  1. Pingback: My Kind of Romance | look beyond the imperfections

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