Are Break-Ups Bad?

I’ve been seeing a lot of break ups recently.

Two girls at my work were broken up with by their boyfriends and a girl who helps run the military support page that I am part of on Facebook was broken up with by her Marine.

I noticed something in common about everyones responses to the news of the break up; everyone saw it as a bad thing and many people said something along the line of “I hope you work it out and get back together”

Am I the only one who disagrees with both these statements?

I don’t think break ups are necessarily a bad thing. Are they painful? Heck yes. I cried for weeks when my first boyfriend broke up with me.

But does being painful make it a bad thing altogether? I don’t think so.

I think break ups are actually a blessing in disguise. They are freedom from someone who didn’t value you they way they should; from someone who didn’t love you the way you should be loved by a partner. They are freedom to find someone else; someone who will appreciate you for who you are and count themselves blessed to be your partner.

I’ve also never understood the break up and get back together cycle that some couples go through. The reason being, why would you want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you? That person looked at you and all you had to offer, and they decided “I don’t want that”. They took a long hard look at you and the relationship and said “nope”. Why would I want that person back?

I deserved to be loved. I deserve to be appreciated. I deserve to be with someone who knows what they have when they have me.

If the person I am with does not value me the way I deserve, then they are doing me a favor by ending things.

What do you think? Have you even broken up and got back together? Are there certain situations where it is beneficial? A


4 thoughts on “Are Break-Ups Bad?

  1. I learned the hard way that a breakup should stay that way. Yes it is painful, but it teaches you something about yourself and what you want from life.

    I think it is human nature to immediately think of getting back together. Obviously the relationship was meaningful, it had its good qualities (one of them may even have been love). But it didn’t work, and that had nothing to do with meaning or love. I broke up with someone I loved very much a few months ago, and while at first I was upset, I now am able to look more objectively at that relationship, what worked, and what didn’t. And it taught me about what I want (and don’t want) in a relationship, and that too was important.

    I think that people who see breakups as only a bad thing are very one-dimensional thinkers. In reality, they are a chance to grow and learn serving about oneself.

  2. I truly believe that you encounter people in your life for a reason whether it be to teach them something or they are teaching you about something you need to know. Some people last awhile while others only last a brief moment in time. Every breakup I have ever had has helped me realize what kind of man I want to be with and what values and ethics I hold dear to me. Looking back now, every heartache I ever had has led me in the right path to my husband. I think people try to make it work with the same person over and over again because they are not ready to accept the lesson that that person is meant to teach them in their lifetime. Love your post πŸ™‚

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