“It Doesn’t Get Easier, You Just Get Stronger”

Continuing the Link-up: What we’ve learned from the unexpected (in your first year of marriage)

I’ve talked about this before, but I feel that the biggest thing I learned in our first year of marriage is how to be alone.

our first "in uniform" photo; Pensacola FL

our first “in uniform” photo; Pensacola FL

I knew Jeremy was in the military when we got married, so it wasn’t unexpected that he would have to leave for an extended period of time. But I don’t think any military wife fully expects the first separation, and I certianly didn’t expect to react that way that I did.

I had an unexpectedly hard time when Jeremy went to Florida for 5 months after we had been married for less than 6 months.

Looking back, it’s hard to imagine that I felt the way that I did. We have since survided 2 deployments and numerous trainings and other schoolings since that first separation. I am now a “seasoned” military wife, the idea of him leaving is sad, but I am no longer defeated by the thought of being alone for months on end. I do not feel unprepared or overwhelmed with anxiety and sadness at the thought of him having to go away.

My husband is (most likely) career military, so I guess there comes a point where you do get used to it. Used to being alone. Used to missing your spouse.

I remember seeing a quote once: “It doesn’t get easier, you just get strong”

Looking back at that first separation, I know that I am a stronger person now. Life has tested me, and I have grown and changed in response to those challenges (both expected and unexpected).

2 thoughts on ““It Doesn’t Get Easier, You Just Get Stronger”

  1. This is encouraging to me because I am new to the military life. I feel like I am growing and handling things pretty well but I have been suffering from a lot of anxiety, sadness, and fear because our first deployment is coming up. It’s going to be the longest we have been separated ever. It’s encouraging to hear that everyone feels this way the first few times but they get better at it. Or stronger…
    It is nice reading your blogs! I am glad I found some other encouraging military wives to follow because I look up to you guys who have been through it before and you guys inspire me! I hope I can be as strong as some of you ladies!

    • Thank you! I promise you, you do get used to it and you figure out how to handle the separations and make them manageable. Of course, you will always miss them and be sad when they leave, but you learn to cope 🙂

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