my challenge to fellow military spouses

I decided to write a continuation of my pervious post “at least he isn’t deployed” because I think that I missed an important issue.

Military S/O’s are experts at being away from their partners.

In the 4 years and 8 months that Jeremy and I have been together we have spent 20 months apart.  That’s nearly 2 years of trainings, schools and deployments. 

I have a plethora of first hand experience of what it’s like to miss my partner, and I’m sure most military spouses do as well.

So here is my challenge to my fellow military ladies, how do you chose to use your knowledge and expertise?

By putting down anyone who hasn’t been through as long of a separation as you and degrading their experience? Or by sharing your knowledge and giving advice? By comforting your civilian or military friends who are missing their partner and having a hard time with the distance.  

Just something to think about.


6 thoughts on “my challenge to fellow military spouses

  1. I try to be honest and give the best advice I can. Having been through three deployments with my husband, I try to give ideas for getting through them and lend a shoulder for those rough days. I think a lot of spouses forget what it was like for them in the beginning and end up taking it out on others. Sometimes we have to take a minute and remember how nervous and/or scared we were. I have to admit though…I have had those rough days too. On some of those days it has been hard to be so sympathetic towards my civilian friends that are having a hard time due to their husbands being out of town for the weekend and such. I think we all go through that! But in the end, you gotta realize they aren’t used to dealing with the distance and time apart like we are. Keeping yourself grounded is the best way to help others.

  2. I’m relatively new to this life, but I feel like my husband and I have been through a lot in the time that we’ve been together. I do my best to support other military wives, and I try to talk to non-military wives about what it’s like to be a military wife in order to teach them how to support military spouses. I feel like civilian wives don’t understand what our lives are like and therefore don’t understand how to support us during military separations.

    Also, I just want to tell you that your blog is my favorite military-geared/military wife blog that I’ve found. You write really, really well, and I like everything that you write about 🙂 Thanks!

  3. Just stumbled upon your blog, and I love this post! I am very involved with MCCS and volunteering, and a lady who used to run one of our deployment support programs always said, “hardship is hardship no matter what”. I love this! I totally agree that military spouses can fall into the “who has it worse off” competition, and it makes me sad–instead of fighting about who wins the pity award, we should spend our time helping each other thrive ALL hardships and supporting one another.

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